A Glimpse into my Thoughts. . .

When I started nursing school, I always thought I would go on to get my nurse practitioner license.  I liked the idea of having more autonomy in helping someone with their health goals.  But, shortly after I started my nursing career in a pediatric intensive care unit, I soon realized I didn't need to become a nurse practitioner!  I LOVED what I was doing!  Working in a PICU is a stressful place for sure.  God has definitely gifted me with the ability to handle that type of stress and provide quality care to not only the patient but also the family of the patient.  Meeting someone where they are at in such a stressful time while using the gifts God has given me brings me immense joy and satisfaction!  So, I had no desire whatsoever to go back to school to get my master's degree when I didn't need it to keep doing what I was already doing - being a great bedside nurse.  I knew God would have to really get my attention somehow if I was ever going to consider working somewhere other than the PICU.  So, I've kept plugging away at taking care of the sickest of the sick.  As time as gone on, things have changed a little where I work.  The unit has grown from a 15 bed unit to a 41 bed unit.  It's not the close family feel it used to have.  We have made some amazing advances in the quality of care we provide!!!  My skills have grown and I've been able to impact the lives of my coworkers and those I care for and I wouldn't change that for anything.  However, my priorities and passions have started to change just a little.  I still LOVE what I do as a PICU nurse!  The chance to walk alongside someone when their loved one is super sick is a privilege.  However, along with the growth of the unit, I am starting to feel my passion shrinking just a little.  I think part of that is because I don't get to train new nurses as much as I used to.  With the unit being as big as it is and because I'm also an ECMO nurse, I just don't get the opportunity.  I miss that a lot actually!!  I have come to realize how much I enjoy teaching others what I know.  I love to work one on one with someone to teach them, encourage them, and help them be better as a nurse than I am.  I have also found something I've become super passionate about.  That is essential oils.  I know many of you that will read this already know that I love essential oils and will talk about them any chance I can.  But, do you really understand why I love them and why I'm passionate about them?  Some might say I'm just trying to sell something, I've been brain-washed, I'm into snake oils, or I'm just nuts.  Let me set the record straight:  I'm not just trying to sell something.  I truly believe there is a better way to help live a more natural life by ridding our homes of toxic chemicals and using natural, plant-based products and giving our bodies the support they really need to live the life we were meant to live.  I haven't been brain-washed and am not into snake oils.  And, I don't think I'm nuts.  As a PICU nurse, I have to know about the details.  I have to really use my brain to see the whole picture when it comes to caring for someone who is critically ill.  Everything we do or don't do affects their lives.  I have to make sure at work that I'm using the medicines and treatments safely and correctly in order for them to be effective.  The same goes for essential oils.  I want to make sure I educate myself as much as possible about essential oils so that I use them correctly, and can educate others correctly.  Because, even natural, plant-based products and essential oils can be harmful if not used safely and correctly.  So, when I realized that I really did enjoy educating others, I decided I wanted to start pursuing the chance to educate others on the benefits of pure essential oils.  Well, if I'm going to educate others, I must first educate myself.  So, while I said years ago that I would never go back to school, I've done just that.  I have started a program to become a Certified Clinical Aromatherapist.  I want to make sure that I know as much as I can about essential oils so that I'm educating people properly and not just spreading misinformation.  There is a lot of misinformation circulating around the internet about essential oils.  So, I am doing what I can to educate myself appropriately on the safe use of pure essential oils.  This hasn't been an easy decision and it is taking a lot of focus.  But, thankfully my husband is 100% supportive of this as is the rest of my family.
I'm not leaving my current job any time soon as I still love being a PICU nurse.  However, I now have something else that is sparking a lot of interest and passion.  My desire is that I will be able to walk along-side people and find out where they are coming from, learn about their lives, and see if I can help them on their journey towards living a life of Wellness, Purpose, and Abundance!

Striving for . . .

Sometimes (actually a lot of the time), Jesus has a way of speaking right to you.  You often don't expect it, but there it is - TRUTH!  I've known Jesus personally for a long time - since I was about 6 years old.  But, no matter how long I've known Him, He still surprises me and amazes me.  He surprises me in the way He speaks to me - whether it's through a book, devotional, friend, or simply by the sunrise.  He amazes me in that even when I've known Him for so long, He continues to love me and forgive me despite the fact that I'm always messing up, always failing, always turning to other things/people instead of Him.  I often don't give Him the quality time He deserves.  I get so consumed with connecting in some way with people whether through social media or face to face that I often neglect the One I should connect with the most.  When we continually go to the One who made us, that's where our true validation is and not from the world.  The world never validates us for who we truly are and that's where our perpetual discontentment comes from.  The world's standards are vastly different than God's.  We will always feel empty if we try to fill ourselves up from the world.  But, if we seek Christ and to be filled by Him, then, we fill fulfilled.  
Last year I sought to get healthy physically.  I saw the path I was on and sought to change the direction I was headed.  I worked hard and lost a lot of weight.  I feel and look great!  But, how much time and effort did I give to my spiritual health last year?  Did I work hard at losing the weight of what the world's standards have put on me?  Did I strive to fill my heart with His truth, His love?  Did I seek Him to be spiritually cleansed?  By the world's standards, I'm healthy.  But, what really matters is my spiritual health - all else is temporary.  I told myself last Fall that I was going to put more focus on my relationship with Christ.  I long for His closeness.  Yet, I continue to do what I don't want to do - pursue worldly connections.
Then, late Fall, early Winter, I decided to set out on a new adventure - pursuing a business by helping others on their journey to health/wellness by educating them on how Young Living Essential Oils can aid in helping them stay above the wellness line and keep their bodies in balance.  My passion for this endeavor grew and continues to grow.  So, yet again, something is starting to consume my time/thoughts/energy other than Christ.  Now, I don't think my endeavor is wrong by any means.  But, last night as I was doing my devotions, I was convicted by God.  Have I truly sought God in my new business?  Have I talked to Him at length about my heart/passion?  Has He given me His blessing to move forward?  I've prayed about it here and there, but have I truly sought His guidance?  Earlier this year I bought the devotional book "Jesus Calling" by Sarah Young.  I loved the fact the daily devotions were short and written as Christ talking directly to me.  The following is taken directly from the entry for March 8:
              SAVE YOUR BEST STRIVING FOR SEEKING MY FACE.  I am constantly communicating with you.  To find Me and hear My voice, you must seek Me above all else.  Anything that you desire more than me becomes an idol.  When you are determined to get your own way, you blot Me out of your consciousness.  Instead of single-mindedly pursuing some goal, talk with Me about it.  Let the Light of My Presence shine on this pursuit so that you can see it from My perspective.  If the goal fits into My plans for you, I will help you reach it.  If it is contrary to My will for you, I will gradually change the desire of your heart.  'Seek Me first' and foremost; then the rest of your life will fall into place, piece by piece.  1 Chronicles 16:11 says, "Look to the LORD and his strength; seek his face always." Matthew 6:33 says, "But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well."
WOW!! Talk about conviction.  My heart's desire is to honor Christ with my life and give Him glory.  I pray that I will take this devotional to heart and truly "SEEK HIS FACE."  The blessings I will receive as a result of pursing Christ, will be immeasurable.  And the blessings may not be material or monetary, but rather eternal.  As I continue to pursue my new business and passion, I pray that I do so in a way that puts God first and His plan for me.  I know God will honor my efforts in a way the brings glory to Him.